It's Raining Babies!

Babies, babies, everywhere babies.

Singer Jewel has gone from living in a van to living in a Texas ranch house with her husband, Ty Murray.  She has also recently signed on to star in a reality show for Bravo and on their first day of filming, the singer found out she was pregnant.

"I took a pregnancy test and it was positive!" the singer reveals. "It was so hard to keep it a secret. I was worried I'd start throwing up on set and everyone would be like, 'Oh, she's pregnant.'"

Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr have welcomed a baby boy into their little family, a very big baby boy.  The son, born last Friday, weighed almost ten pounds and is said to be absolutely adorable.

The couple haven't released pictures or a name as of yet, but family and friends have said that they have never seen the couple happier.

And last, but not least, there is Khloe Kardashian Odom.  She is constantly plagued by pregnancy rumors, however this time I hear that it is actually true.  While Khloe's people haven't confirmed anything yet, I wouldn't put it past her. Can you think of any better PR when you have your own reality show about to start?

As long as that damn stork stays away from me....oh you need a vagina involved?  Well then, I'm good.

Another Kardashian Show To Hit TV

E! has announced today that they will be developing yet another show from the Kardashian franchise, this one will revolve around the newly married Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom.

Khloe and Lamar will begin filming in very shortly, picking up right after the couple celebrates their one year anniversary.  Though the show will focus on Khloe and Lamar's every day life, it will also include Khloe's younger brother Robert and his foray into the music business.  This will be yet another reality show Ryan Seacrest is producing, making him even more rich.

I just want to know how much longer the Kardashian's fifteen minutes will last.  They are really famous for nothing.  I mean, if Kim hadn't taped herself doing Brandy's little brother, then we would have no idea who any of them are. Also, haven't these newlyweds and married couples learned from past divorced couples who once let camera into their then happy homes?  A reality show is the curse of death, and Khloe and Lamar already didn't have much going for them in the luck department.

How much longer until Kourt and Scott plus 8?

Fash Bash

Ashley Greene

Mavis Beyotch: Even though it looks slightly like she's wearing a bed sheet, it's simple and elegant.  Vive le bed sheet!
Kate's Evil Twin: The bed sheet, really Nikki?  Aren't you dating some bazillionaire left over who used to date Paris Hilton?  Did Paris Hilton sneak in one night with the spare key and take all your good clothes?  Wait.  *listens*  So.... apparently this is NOT Nikki Reed.  This is some other interchangeable actress who plays a vampire. Whatever, it's still a bed sheet.
Gossip Boy: Dude, you got the money you wanted, you can stop playing the poor girl and wearing your linens.

 Madonna

Mavis Beyotch: Poor dear.  She is somehow confused and believes that she's still in Dick Tracey...this time as  Dick Tracey.  Must be that hot young cabana boy she has.  Has made her brain just the tiniest bit squishy.

Kate's Evil Twin: Here are my keys.  It's a black Audi.  Don't scratch it this time and don't drive it too fast around the block or you won't get Mr. George Washington here.

Gossip Boy: What the F*ck?

 Nikki Reed

Mavis Beyotch: So this is how the swan dress that silly Bjorck wore years ago was recycled.  Either that, or she has a serious addiction to chicken, and doesn't know what to do with the feathers.

Kate's Evil Twin: So THIS is Nikki Reed.  Honey, Kristen is pulling off the random figure skater dress much better than you.  It's all about the accessories.  See below.

Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Taylor Lautner

Mavis Beyotch: I wonder what terrible accident happened on the way that caused the sleeve to fall off.  Maybe that werewolf got a bit peckish.  But I'm happy she hooked up with those nice gentlemen from the 50s skiffle band.

Kate's Evil Twin: Oh hallo boys.  Brava Kristen, brava!  You see, Kristen here is following all of the Kate Bosworth fashion rules.  When in doubt about your questionably fashionable cotton ball dress, accessorize with a young hot, presumably gay actor.  Or two.  Always keep a spare penis on hand, I always say. And a breath mint.  Three cheers for Kristen!

Gossip Boy: Eenie, meanie, miney mo, which of these people looks like a big ole mo?  That's right, I said it.

 Gwyneth Paltrow

Mavis Beyotch: I am sure when this dress is finished it will be lovely.  What?  It is?  I am so embarrassed.

Kate's Evil Twin: Dear Gwyneth, What's going on?  I haven't seen you in ages!!!  I miss our girl time at the spa; colonics, detoxes, botoxes, talking about boys and all those things that Chris does that drive you crazy.  I kept a list you know, like good friends do.  I see you're still living out of a suitcase, fashioning dresses from tablecloths.  Please call if you want to borrow a dress that wasn't sewn by child laborers named Apple.  Love you miss you! Kate's Evil Twin.

Victoria Beckham

Mavis Beyotch: Channeling the 90s.  When the Spice Girls mattered, even ever so slightly.  And when she last ate something other than paper towels.

Kate's Evil Twin: I'm too scared to criticize this outfit.  Have you heard what fembots from outerspace can do to a 98 lb waif like myself??  

Gossip Boy: Start saving for that hip replacement you are going to need.

 Jessica Alba

Mavis Beyotch: This is what happens when bad clothes happen to beautiful people.  You forget that they're beautiful and just concentrate on the ugly.

Kate's Evil Twin:The first student in Victoria Beckham's Fembot from Outerspace School for Desperately Edgy Actresses.  First lesson.  Master the bitchface, Jessica, or people will keep laughing at your shoes.  And your hair.

Khloe Kardashian

Mavis Beyotch: I think it's very sweet of her mother to not have ever told her she was the chubby, unattractive sister.  However, it's now time for someone to do that.

Kate's Evil Twin: As anyone who follows me on Twitter (@kateseviltwin) knows, I am a bevy of incredibly astute fashion advice.  One of the questions I get asked over and over again is, "how should a fat girl dress?"  (I'm currently in the process of eliminating all fat followers, but never mind).  Khloe, please follow me on twitter because you are breaking ALL THE RULES. 1. Wear black. 2. Don't show skin (ew.) 3. Spanx are more than your sister's favorite bedroom activity. See you on twitter!