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Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Meet Christian Darko

Christian Darko is a hot young guy who is very well known in town.  Not only do the ladies love him, but the guys drool over him as well.  Maybe not as much as other guys like him, but he has his gay following.

CD loves his gay fans, a lot actually.  He hangs out with them whenever he gets a chance and often gives them access to meet him. He has been tempted many a time, but has always had a girlfriend.  Christian is a not the cheating kind, but he is not really a catch either.

Christian was raised with religious morals and standards, one that probably have messed his pretty little head up. But he was given an assistant, one who was gay and proud about it.  Funny thing is, the star's mother loves the guy and was the one to hire him.

Christian spent a lot of time with Handy Helper and they bonded, too much.  Christian and Handy Helper not only began fooling around, they fell for each other.  They kept their relationship a secret and Christian told Handy that he would not be able to come out for quite awhile.  Christian has let Handy bring out his inner kinky boy and the hotness began.

Christian is constantly making Handy perform certain pleasures in public places.  Most recently, a popular hangout in L.A.  Tucked away in a dark corner with his hat pulled down, Christian sat back while Handy got a little mouthy.  Word got back to Christian's woman and she split pretty quickly.  Thankfully for Christian, his people gave her something green to keep her mouth shut.

Better watch out, Christian.  If you were caught in the corner this time, what will you be caught doing next time?

It's Not

Zac Efron
Nick Jonas
Jake Gyllenhaal

27 comments:

Anonymous said...

...almost sounds like a certain couple we've been reading about the last few days...

Anonymous said...

Sounds like Ryan Phillipe

Anonymous said...

Joe Jonas

Anonymous said...

Your blinds are getting very good, GB. I am hooked on them! But I really want to hear about Justin Case, or that lesbian from the one blind a long time ago. But my guess for this is Ed Westwick, makes sense. Maybe she dumped him, not the other way around.

rog457 said...

I really suck at figuring these things out, but one thing stuck me as odd. First you say "Not only do the ladies love him, but the guys drool over him as well" then in the next paragraph you say "Christian is a not the cheating kind, but he is not really a catch either.

I'm not sure how he can be loved and drooled over and not be a catch, unless there is something really wrong with him.

Discobitch said...

need more clues GB!!

actor or musician?

Age Group?

is it that other jonas guy? not sure of their names tbh :S

Anonymous said...

Well hey there, Joe Jonas. Someone has to tell him that oral sex is still sex! GB has also hinted (when talking about the JoBros) that Kevin Jonas is by far not the most interesting Jonas..

Anonymous said...

Something pinged in my head with the 'something green to keep her mouth shut' but I can't remeber who it was I was reading about! Though he almost sounds like Daniel Radcliffe except the relgious upbringing bit.

BobNYC said...

Joe Jonas is not a catch? He IS. So it can't be him. The Christian part and the rest of the story sure fit, especially with the proximity to the Jonas breakup story. But not a catch? Pourquoi?

Anonymous said...

Did Ashley Greene recently break up with somebody?

Gemini850 said...

Justin Timberlake.

Gemini850 said...

It can't be any of the Jonas brothers because aren't they Jewish and not Christian?

AJ said...

Its soooo Kanye West!!
Straight guys like his music a lot, not a good catch cos of his ego and the GF was Amber Rose who it was reported was given hush money....

And those rumours have been around for a while!!

Anonymous said...

Just goes to show you that taste is subjective. The Jonas trio don't do a thing for me! At All!!

Anonymous said...

Sorry everyone that is going to kill me for saying this, but immediately upon reading this I though of Rob Pattinson. I've never thought of him as a catch-looks like he's stinky in a bad way.

Discobitch said...

i dont like the JoBro's either *vom!* or Kanye :S although i do recall Amber Rose being paid hush money in a 7 figure amount!!

could be JT or maybe one of the Glee crowd? (dont really watch it but its still a guess =))

Discobitch said...

ps it doesnt actually say hes an ACTUAL christian, just brought up with religious morals =)

Anonymous said...

I like the Joe Jonas guess and the Kanye West guess except that despite his big ass ego, he's still a catch and his Momma is dead.

~SimplyNee

Anonymous said...

taylor lautner. Thats my guess for every closeted bv.

anon57 said...

I also like the Kanye guess except, as perviously mentioned, his mother is dead and I don't know if I'd consider him young. I mean he's not old, just not young either. And Rob Pattinson or Taylor Launter can't be the answer to everthing. My guess is Joe Jonas.

Anonymous said...

kanye west. the entertainment lawyer posted a blind vice on 05/06 about him and his asian assistantt

Anonymous said...

Didn't Joe Jonas have a spot in the Vampire video along with Mr. Donnie Darko himself Jake Gyllenhaal?

Troy and Brittany said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

This reads like Joe Jonas fanboy fanfic, lol, sorry.

I'm not saying he's not gay, but really?

Anonymous said...

Joe Jonas...the end

Gabby said...

This sounds SO much like Joe Jonas... there's been a lot of pics lately of him and a "friend," he and Demi are no longer together, his parents are very involved in his life, and he and his brothers are very well known for having strict religious morals

Anonymous said...

it is definitely kanye west.. remember now he paid off amber rose to keep her mouth shut about catching him it the back of the club gettin some dome from a guy....