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Thursday, March 4, 2010

Get Ready To Get Lost On Gilligan's Island is reporting that yet another remake is in the works, following in the footsteps of what seems to be a popular trend.  Is it just me, or does it seem like Hollywood is flat out of ideas?  Not only are they turning to classic hits to milk for more money, they cannot even come up with decent names for the shit-tastic movies that they do manage to create on their own.  Law Abiding CitizenThe Crazies?  Really?  I mean, come on.  At least try and think of something a little more creative.  I guess it doesn't really matter in the end.  you can put a pile of crap in a pretty box and call it anything and at the end of the day, it's still crap.

So now we have another remake on our hands.  News is that Warner Bros. has announced plans to make a movie out of Gilligan's Island, the '60s sitcom about seven castaways stranded on an uninhabited Pacific island after a three hour tour boat ride gets caught in a storm.  We all know the song, we all know the show.  Though it seems a lot of people are from overseas, so at the bottom is the YouTube clip of the opening to Gilligan's Island.  Feel free to cuss me out at 3 pm when you all realize this song is still stuck in your head.

My only problem is that remakes never, ever live up to the original.  Remakes fall into a gray catagory in HW.  It's the only time an agent will not push you to do a project if you chose not to.  Remakes must be done right, and HW has a very bad track record.  I have to worry that they won't ruin Adventures in Babysitting, The A-Team, and now Gilligan's Island.  HW has already tried to re-create past success and has failed.

The upside to all of this is that Gilligan's Island has such an array of characters that if played right, this could become an amazing movie filled with a variety of A-Listers.  The creator of the series, Sherwood Schwartz apparently mentioned that his dream cast involved Michael Cera as Gilligan and Beyonce as Ginger.  Thank baby Jesus that nothing is official.  Cera would be a perfect fit for Gilligan, but there is no way in hell that Beyonce should be Ginger.  No way in Hell.  Beyonce is not comedic, she can barely pull off a music video.  She is very talented, but actress she is not. 

Here's an idea, find new talent.  If HW wasn't such a cult, the film industry would be booming.  There are so many talented writers, film makers, actors and actresses out there that are not even getting a shot.  Some young kid sitting in middle America right now has the best idea for a screenplay that will never get heard because of HW politics.  Here's a tip of advice.  If you are part of the problem, you're NOT part of the solution. 

If you are a fan, who do you think should be in the movie?


Anonymous said...

They have already re-made the essence of this show, it’s called LOST.

The premise is of this show is only funny if you take into consideration that everybody on the island appears to be mentally handicapped. That being said this movie could be hilarious with the right casting:

Gilligan – Michael Cera is actually a good choice.
The Skipper – Paul Giamatti
The Millionare & his wife – Thomas Haden Church/ Marcia Cross
The Movie Star – a crossdresser (ala Ru Paul) or Monica Belucci
The Professor – David Tennant, Ryan Reynolds
Maryann – Mila Kunis, Jennifer Love Hewitt

Kathryn said...

The idea of one more remake just makes me want to hurl.

Seriously WTH?

Anonymous said...

I can always count on you for laugh, GB.

Anonymous said...

The Professor: Connor Trinneer.

Cap said...

Cera as Gilligan is brilliant.

Clooney for the professor (he should be older but good-looking)

Jessica Simpson for Ginger (it's okay that she can't act - neither could Ginger. That was the joke)

Joy Gallati for Mary Ann

Mike Meyers for the millionaire and Cameron Diaz for his wife.

John Goodman for the skipper.

Anonymous said...

Gilligan = Joel Moore