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Friday, March 4, 2011

The Secret Love Life Of Boney Skin Tight

We all love Boney Skintight, trust me.  Everyone runs to see his latest flick, or his latest guest spot on an obscure television show.  I swear he is the meaning behind the line " I'm a get your heart racing in my skin tight jeans...."

And while Boney has worked very hard to become the object of our attention and spend most of his time in the limelight, we all know that it's what happens behind close doors that gets our attention.  Boney isn't your regular in the closest Joe Schmoe.  Uh-uh.

While Boney does have a significant other that is also in the biz, his heart doesn't always lie with the va jay jay.  But Boney's girl does know this fact, and she has no problem with it.  She likes to go both ways as well and loves the attention that she gets from dating Boney.  Her previous attempt at being part of a power couple failed miserably and left her the odd girl out. 

Boney loves to have a good time in the bedroom.  They actually have a routine that they follow, and it has landed them many a one night stand.  Boney's girl will flirt with the guy to see if there is actually a prospect that he likes boys.  If he does, or she thinks he can be persuaded, she will accompany the unsuspecting fellow to their VIP room and introduce them to Boney.  After a lot of flirting and drunken foreplay, they lead the stranger to their place for some more partying.  Boney's girl loves to watch her man get it on with another guy, and vice versa.

But one night they may have gone too far.  Boney and his girl brought a guy home, but the guy refused to play for the other team.  Boney took it personally and went to sulk privately while Boney's girl didn't want to let a hot man slip through her fingers.  The next morning, said drunken hot boy wakes up next to a naked Boney and looses his mind.  Hotel room was trashed as Boney was called every name in the book.  Cost Boney a lot of cash, not only to repair the room, but to keep drunk boy's mouth shut.

What Boney doesn't know is that drunk boy and Boney's girl have struck up a friendship.  She wants to be the star of her latest flick, and nothing says star like scandal.  She has already destroyed previous co-star's reputation, what makes Boney think he will be any different?


It's Not:
Russell Brand
Nick Jonas
Daniel Craig




17 comments:

Dave said...

Joe Jonas perhaps? He sort of fits - skinny jeans, reference to "Joe" Schmoe, and his brother notted.

But I'm not sure - did anyone rush to see Camp Rock 2? And I always got the impression that he and Ashley Greene don't even like each other, and that it's pure bearding rather than occasional hook-ups. Hmm...

Sheila said...

Missed you Gossip Boy!

Anonymous said...

The best I can come up with is Justin Long, but I don't know if people rush to see his movies, I can't find a lot of TV guest spots, and not sure if he's still with Drew. Still, I could see him and Drew swinging with other guys. Anyway, welcome back, Gossip Boy!

Anonymous said...

Great to see you posted again Gossip Boy, you were missed!! Hope things are going well by you!

damianoverton said...

Chris Pine did some random tv guest spots on Six feet Under and Our Generation. He loves tight jeans and has had us running to the box office for Star Trek and Unstoppable.

Anonymous said...

james franco?

Anonymous said...

Skarsgard

Anonymous said...

Skarsgard??? How does this fit him?
"Everyone runs to see his latest flick, or his latest guest spot on an obscure television show."

Anonymous said...

Bradley Cooper

Anonymous said...

I was also thinking Bradley Cooper, he wears very tight jeans and Renee did have an embarrassing first marriage to that Country singer that only lasted five minutes. The only problem is that I have a hard time believing Renee would take part in the game of reeling drunk hotties back to their bed. Guess you never know...

Anonymous said...

hi gossip boy first timer-u r trully missed hop yo back wid more insightful BI`s .Cnt wait 2 here more.xoxo

Anonymous said...

Jude Law?

kitaso said...

My first thought was Franco as well, but his gf isn't particularly well known is she?

Anonymous said...

Justin Timberlake

dmoney said...

My first thought was Justin Timberlake as well. However I don't know of Jessica Biel ever ruining one of her co stars lives. I'm thinking Ashton Kutcher for this one.

Anonymous said...

Pattinson and Stewart FTW

Anonymous said...

it's joe jonas.
skin tight jeans. "joe schmoe"
russell brand made jokes about the jonas brothers
nick is his brother
he has a fascinating obsession with daniel craig.